Dance Studio by Day, Mom by Heart: Finding Connection in the Chaos

People assume that because I run a dance studio, my kids must live for dance… Spoiler alert: they don’t dance. 

[They may not (yet) share my love for dance, but in every other way—bold style, big energy, and unapologetic individuality—they are so much like me.]

My 13-year-old son is all about logic, gaming, aviation, and sarcasm. My 10-year-old daughter would rather paint a picture or do her makeup than do a jazz square. And honestly? I love that about them.

What’s harder to love? The schedule.

Running a studio means my busiest hours are the opposite of theirs. While they’re in school, I’m buried in admin work and rehearsal planning. When they get home and want to relax, I’m heading out to teach. When they’re going to bed, I’m just getting home—answering emails, prepping for the next day, or cleaning Marley floors. We are, quite literally, on reverse shifts.

And if you’ve ever been a working parent—especially one with a non-traditional schedule—you know the guilt that creeps in. The late-night “Did I miss too much?” thoughts. The calendar reminders that say “quality time,” like it’s a meeting you might miss if you blink too long.

But here’s what I’ve learned: it’s not about the number of hours. It’s not about being there for every moment. It’s about being present for the ones that count.

Sometimes that means five quiet minutes in the morning with my son, where he says more over his cereal than he did all week. Sometimes it’s a goofy voice memo I send my daughter between classes that makes her laugh. Sometimes it’s just sitting in the car, eating drive-thru fries, and talking about absolutely nothing—and having it feel like everything.

What holds it all together is communication. I’ve made it a priority to be open with my kids. I tell them when my schedule is wild. I let them know when I’ll be there—and when I won’t. And in return, they feel comfortable telling me when they need me. When they’re overwhelmed. When they miss me. When they just want to hang out and eat junk food in our pajamas.

It’s not perfect. No one’s life is. But it’s real, and it’s honest, and that’s enough.

To the other parents out there working late shifts, flipping their schedules upside down, or running on fumes: I see you. You don’t have to be everywhere at once to be an incredible parent. You just have to show up in the moments that matter—with your full heart, even if your hair’s a mess and dinner is cereal.

We tell our dancers all the time that quality matters more than quantity. A clean, intentional movement is more powerful than a million rushed steps. The same goes for parenting.

Also… Can We Talk About My Husband for a Second?

Because I absolutely could not do any of this without him.

While I’m spinning (sometimes literally) through rehearsals and studio life, he’s the quiet superhero keeping our home running like clockwork. He’s the one making sure our kids get where they need to go, that they’re fed something other than frozen waffles, and that the laundry doesn’t turn into a textile mountain range. He’s the cook, the cleaner, the calendar manager, the steady hand that holds everything together.

And—perhaps most impressively—he’s the one who gently asks, “Did you mean to leave without your phone… again?” as he hands me the very thing I was frantically searching for three minutes ago.

He doesn’t ask for recognition, but he deserves all of it.

Being a dance studio owner is demanding. Being a mom is even more so. But being able to show up fully in both roles? That’s only possible because I have a partner who shows up just as fully in all the ways that matter most.

So here’s to the behind-the-scenes dads (and moms and partners) who are doing the pickups, packing the lunches, and reminding us where we left our keys. You are the real MVPs—and we see you.

So whether you’re dancing through life or just trying not to trip over the laundry basket—remember: your presence matters. Even if it’s for just a moment. Especially then.